BPA Women in Parking network Woman (back) in parking Jess McGregor, architect at Stripe Consulting, shares the highs, lows, support and discrimination experienced by her family in their first year of juggling parenthood and professions ike the majority of working women on the cusp of maternity leave, I found myself at the precipice between profession and family this time last year. The considerations swirling around my mind were endless: what was going to happen to my career, financial independence, mental health, physical health, free time, family dynamics and social commitments? My partner and I discussed maternity leave, paternity leave, shared parental leave, kit [keeping in touch] days and phased return. At one point, I even considered Gantt charting the next 15 months in some sort of semblance of project managing my anticipated bundle of joy. Having a female managing director who had been through that experience was my port in the storm, alongside the support of the male managing director of our parent company. I was grateful for all the advice, regular reminders to be kind to myself, and muchappreciated, well-timed parent jokes. They kept in touch regularly and I was grateful that they took the time to update me, without the expectation of me responding, or even acknowledging anything outside of my fourth trimester (postpartum) bubble. L Support in high places A mere four weeks after the arrival of our son in September 2022, I braved a work social event, followed by a fantastic BPA Women in Parking event in November, where I had to find somewhere to express milk soon after arriving. Years of being in a male-dominated industry left me feeling embarrassed and apologetic for my inconvenience. Without a pause, the lovely Women in Parking leads, Jade Neville and Hannah Fuller, jumped into action and found me somewhere quiet. I found myself having a wonderful conversation with BPA Board chair Anjna Patel about working mothers and, in a strange juxtaposition, ruefully discussing our sons preferences for breastfeeding over bottle feeding. Ironically, I have struggled to write that knowing this will be side by side with other industry articles. At the event, guest speaker and fast-jet pilot Mandy Hickson provided the stark realisation that not all women have the opportunity to be mothers and maintain their chosen profession, robbing the workforce of all the potential that these women could have brought. Personally, I have been constantly blown away by the shared experiences, solidarity and empowerment I have received from the women and men in our industry. I just wish it was the same for everyone. Eight weeks later, I used one of my kit days to attend a full office training day. This was so important for my continued feeling of inclusivity within the office and for industry updates. Stripe then helped to create a phased return, because I was struggling to adjust to my new dual role. Maximising my remaining kit and split [shared parental leave in touch] days, I gradually increased my working patterns from two days a week back to full time. Mens experiences arent all rosy Something we werent expecting is the unconscious discrimination my partner has experienced. Some expressed dismay that he was taking 12 weeks of shared parental leave. When he returned to work, he felt on the outskirts of the office social circle and on the back foot when it came to career progression and training. The feminist in me was smugly listening to his outrage: I highly recommend more men take parental leave, because nothing instils passion for injustice like shared experience. In reality, women are the ones who shoulder the majority of parenting responsibilities and tend to be the ones whose careers are more affected by parenthood. By not providing a safe environment to discuss family issues, without the stigma of being distracted or not fully committed to our careers, we set women up to fail. Having a family doesnt detract from our ability to succeed in our roles. Anyone who can hold down a professional career while being a parent and surviving on four hours of sleep is already demonstrating an insane ability to multitask, project manage, resource and budget plan, manage client relations, and deal with less-than-happy (small) customers not to mention developing great interpersonal and conflictresolution skills. Who else can list all that on a CV with the successful project outcome 18 years down the line (fingers crossed)? I am truly glad that women are being championed in our profession and I call all members of our industry to join the BPA Women in Parking community. I am proud to be back in the sector and excited to be contributing and supporting my colleagues. Eleven months postpartum, I am settling into my new work/life balance. Who knows where my career will take me, but it will be as an architect AND a mother. Not all women have the opportunity to be mothers and maintain their chosen profession, robbing the workforce of all the potential that these women could have brought 38 PN Sept 2023 pp38-39 WIP2.indd 38 24/08/2023 11:10